Groundhog Day

February 2, 2009. Like Bill Murray in the movie Groundhog Day, this also happens to be my life changing day. This could be a long blog, so if interested you may want to grab a cup of coffee as I get you up to date on what happened this day. I went in to work Monday morning and started noticing some tingling in my left hand. As the morning went on it started getting worse and I just assumed it was a pinched nerve. Later that morning, I started running into little things, like desks and walls. Being the brilliant diagnostician that I am, I assumed it may be a little bit more than a pinched nerve. I called a family physician who got me in right away. So this same guy who's walking into walls drives the 2 miles to get to the doctor's office. Not too bright, but as far as I know, I didn't run anybody over. The doctor ran numerous tests including the first of many EKGs and determined that I'm in great health but there's something wrong and we need to get you to the hospital. For those of you with hairy chest, having multiple EKGs done during the day reminded me of the movie the 40-year-old Virgin when they used the hot wax and tape to remove chest hairs. Anyway, the doctor wanted to make sure I didn't drive again so I was able to get my staff to drop me off at St. Francis Hospital. Now I'm sure it's a nice hospital but they've been doing some remodeling and that four hours of waiting in a makeshift waiting room with one magazine and the old TV that could only get the children station made for a long afternoon. They finally got me in late afternoon and of course they hooked up to EKG and ran their battery of tests. Initial diagnosis was a stroke. They ordered a CT scan and that is when they found the mass in my brain. The doctor also ordered an MRI, but I was told that the radiologists may not want to hang around and do that tonight. Shortly after that it was highly recommended that I be transferred to St. Luke's which was definitely reassuring. Now of course they are not going to let me drive there from a liability standpoint and they wouldn't even let my wife drive me there, so here comes the ambulence to drive me that half a mile to the other hospital. Now you have to realize while this is going on all day I am my usual self, cracking jokes and looking as good as ever. Before I could be transported to St. Luke's, we had to wait for an ICU room to open up. About one hour later the paramedics came in and of course they ripped off the EKGs and put on their own EKGs. They took one look at me and asked if I could look sicker since you were going to the neurological ICU. After having some laughs with these guys through that long trip to the other hospital, I am obliged them by sticking out my tongue and moaning when they brought me into the ICU unit. The fun doesn't stop here. They got me to my room, but there was no bed. About 15 minutes later, they brought in a bed, but there is something wrong with it and nobody could figure out how to fix it. It was acting like a teeter-tauter and was literally teetering about 30° from head to toe. Once they finally got a real bed, they ripped off the EKGs and put new ones on. My stay in the ICU was precautionary because of the tumor and they wanted to wake me up every hour to see how I was doing but not obviously to make sure I was sleeping okay. The next morning they kicked me of ICU because I look too damn good and they put me on the normal neurology floor where they again ripped off those damn EKG leads and placed new ones on. This was a little shorter than I thought it would be, so the coffee may still be warm.

To tie this all together with the movie Groundhog Day, it was a life-changing day. And like the movie, he had the time to make himself a better person and have a happy ending. This is also my plan. By the way, this is my new favorite movie.

POGO